Preschool and Children’s Ministers encouraged to be resilient at annual retreat

“This is my third year coming to the retreat [and] I prioritize it every year, and I plan on coming as long as I can,” said Taylor Doerrig, children’s minister at First Baptist Church Cedar Hill. “It's such a refreshing time to spend with fellow children's ministers, to be able to connect.”

Jan. 27 and 28, Texas Baptists’ Discipleship & NextGen ministry hosted the “Be Still and Know” Preschool and Children’s Ministers Retreat at Summers Mill Conference and Retreat Center in Belton. The retreat began with a devotional message from Julio Guarneri, executive director at Texas Baptists. He spoke to attendees from John 21 and Luke 5:1-11 on the call to follow Jesus. He explained that the call to follow Jesus is a call to be with him, to be with others and to be on mission. 

“In our ministry, as we look for results, as we long to touch the lives of people, how many times do we value our time with Jesus? How much do we long for that time… to be in his presence, to enjoy communion with him?” said Guarneri. “I want to remind you that our call and our identity is not the same as our current position or role… You're a child of God, that's your identity, and he is calling you to be with him, to be with others and to be on mission with him regardless of the position that you hold.” 

317 Collective from First Baptist Church Arlington led worship at the beginning of each session at the retreat. 

Keys to resilience in ministry 

The retreat’s keynote speaker, Shelly Melia, is associate dean for the graduate school of Ministry at Dallas Baptist University. She is also the program director for Master of Arts in Children’s Ministry and Master of Arts in Family Ministry at DBU. She led the first keynote session on being resilient in ministry. She used four illustrations to encourage attendees that they are not alone and resilience is the key to pushing through hard seasons.

The first illustration Melia taught attendees was the Ebenezer Stone. Drawing from 1 Samuel 7, she encouraged attendees that in their ministry, they need to be “placing Ebenezer stones all along the way” as a reminder of all the ways God has helped them. 

“The only way to explain a victory in our life is that God helped us,” said Melia. “Sometimes the way that I get through hard things is just to remind myself of what God's already done in my life, and it gives me the courage to take the next step and to believe that he's going to help me again.” 

Melia’s second illustration was that “ministry is truly a marathon.” Drawing from Philippians 1:6, she told attendees that while she was participating in marathons, God reminded her that he didn’t call her to win but only to start and finish them. 

“We have to remind ourselves that God is only calling us to run our race. We only have to do that which God has called us to do, and we are required to do everything that every other church is doing,” said Melia. “Your job is to be a completer, not a competer.” 

In her third illustration, Melia shared a fishing experience with attendees and challenged them that in order to have resilience, “we have to know what our specific hooks are” and “keep an eye on our bobber.”

“As we think about ministry, as we think about resilience, one of the things that we have to do is we have to keep an eye on our bobber. We have to know when we're going under, and then we have to know what to do to pull ourselves back out,” said Melia.

Melia told attendees that there are “five protective factors” that can help them “jerk back when our bobber goes under.” They are personality (who you are), resources (what you have), relationships (who loves you), family (how your family functions) and faith (what you believe). 

Melia said, “These things can be strengths, or they can be weaknesses,” and challenged attendees to evaluate these for themselves. 

Doerrig said she was encouraged by the “sense of community [and] camaraderie” at the retreat and that Discipleship & NextGen is focused on affirming that “ministry is hard, but we're also not in it alone.”

During the second keynote session, Melia hosted a panel discussion on practical tips for having healthy rhythms in ministry featuring attendees Jay Miller, kids pastor at First Baptist Church Bryan; Lezah Maitland, Minister of Children at First Baptist Church Allen; Jayelyn Boynton, children’s minister at First Baptist Church Salado; Heather Smith, children’s minister at Taylor’s Valley Baptist Church in Temple and Cheryl Reed, lead children’s minister at Del Sol Church in El Paso. 

Melia closed the day with a final illustration. Drawing from Numbers 22, she encouraged attendees that “[if God] can use a donkey to speak to somebody – and the Bible says he did – he can use you.”

“I think the theme of this is do not undersell yourself. God can and will use you when you humble yourself, and we have to be who God gifted us to be as a leader,” said Melia. 

Being in communion with God and fellow ministers 

Guarneri kicked off day two of the retreat with a devotional message from Luke 6:12-19 on the importance of prayer and being in communion with God. He explained that persistent communion with God enables integrity and intimacy and affirms our identity. 

“The most important part of our spiritual life is not what other people see, but what God sees,” said Guarneri. “The external fruit is a product of your internal faith. … To be like Jesus, you need to be with Jesus.” 

He told attendees that their identity is not in their performance but in their position as a child of God. 

“Those who seek God in the secret place find their reward in being loved by the eternal God,” said Guarneri. “It is an experience in his love that we find our reward is the assurance of being his children, and when you understand that, then you can serve God and others with freedom.”

In the third and final keynote session of the retreat, Melia led a panel discussion featuring Jennifer Howington, associate director of Discipleship & NextGen and childhood ministry specialist at Texas Baptists, and her friend and lay leader at First Baptist Church Glen Rose, Mandy Gartrell. 

Howington and Gartrell shared with attendees how they encouraged and strengthened one another to endure in ministry through their cancer diagnoses, and restored health, over the past year.

Gartrell said over the past year, she found “freedom from anxiety and fear” through lifting others up in prayer. 

“I think when you allow people into that space and let them pray for you, God does miraculous things,” said Howington. 

Melia shared a final illustration with attendees, encouraging them that “we need elephants in our lives” to protect, pray for and celebrate us. Elephants surround those in their herd that are weak or wounded and kick up dust to shield them from harm. 

“We want you to find your elephants. Find your herd, and not only receive the blessing of that but give the blessing of protecting your sisters and your brothers and also celebrating them. Elephants will help you stay in ministry,” said Melia. 

“Be ready in and out of season”  

In the afternoon Bible study session, Guarneri gave a final devotional message from John 15:1-8 on abiding in Christ. He explained that Jesus, in his ministry, modeled a healthy rhythm of working from our rest rather than resting from our work. 

“None of us can serve and minister 24/7; that’s not how God designed us,” said Guarneri. “The idea of the Sabbath is a reminder that God is in control and we're not; that if I stop working, the world would still turn; that if I rest, God is still in charge.” 

Lisa Keeling, minister to families and kids at Tallowood Baptist Church in Houston, said she loves that Texas Baptists prioritizes giving ministers time to step away and focus on their relationship with God. 

“I think one thing about this retreat is it consistently helps me have time for worship and to focus on my own spiritual growth and this year is no different. [It’s] even better, actually,” said Keeling. “This is a time where I get to step away and really focus on what God is showing me right now and the steps I can take myself to continue to grow spiritually so that I can do the ministry he's asked me to do.” 

Drawing from 2 Timothy 4:2 and 4:21, Bennye Bryant, director of the Women In Ministry Network at Texas Baptists, closed the retreat by encouraging attendees to “be ready in and out of season.” She told attendees that readiness comes from making every effort to support fellow ministers, have fellow ministers supporting them and to “take care of our temple.”

“Timothy became an effective leader because of Paul… They give us an example of what a relationship would look like when we encourage each other,” said Bryant. “When we take care of our temple, we can help others.” 

To learn more about how the Discipleship & NextGen ministry can be a resource to you and your church, visit txb.org/discipleship.